Saturday, March 31, 2007

Home Again and Feeling Very Loved

Hey wonderful friends and family. I'm home from the hospital and doing much better. I'm still in some pain, but compared to what I'd been dealing with since
last Friday, this is a breeze. I'm very tired and weak due to being in bed since Monday morning and the whole mental part of dealing with so much pain.

We'll know in the next two weeks or so if the surgery to drain the abscess was completely successful. For now I'm being positive and assuming it was successful and will continue to be while I take immaculate care of myself.

I have a month worth of meds and Smart Guy is working to get it filled every month for the rest of my natural born life.

Thank you so much for the prayers, love, and concern. Until you've gone thru something like this, you have no idea what it feels like to know that there are people all over the country loving you and praying for you. I was literally on the phone with Inkling telling her to post to my blog while they were pulling my bed out of my room and towards the surgical suite. You guys are so incredibly important to me and I knew you'd hold me up. You're an awesome group of women and I love you all.

I have read everyone's posts this week. Smart Guy read them aloud to me one night and copied them all for me another because I was unable to sit up for more than a few seconds at a time due to the location of this lovely "2-inch infected zit" (gross, huh). I've read some for myself right off the screen earlier this evening. Know that while you aren't getting comments from me, I'm still here, just not able to sit long enough for any extra typing.

I will be swallowing up to 15 pills a day for awhile. Anyone that knows me, knows that I'm a pill-weenie and hate to swallow them. I'm talkin' one pill at a time, throwin' the head back and everything... it's very dramatic. Smart Guy and Mom think it's hilarious and laugh whenever they watch, if anyone wants to come beat them up for me, have at 'em. It'll pretty much take forever to swallow.

Well, I must climb in bed, I haven't actually slept for more than a few hours a night since last Saturday night, so I'm purty much fried! I love you guys!

Friday, March 30, 2007

Quick Note From Inkling

If any of you from Grace's church are wondering how you can help, wander on over to my blog and read the latest post. You'll find practical ideas for helping Grace and her family, as well as a few courageous suggestions on how to work a "miracle" with the crazy insurance situation. So head on over, read, and then get serving. This Inkling who is 2500 miles away and can't be there in person thanks you from the bottom of her heart.

Update #2

Inkling here again. I just got off the phone with Grace. We got to talk for 40 of the most beautiful minutes I've ever known. It was so good to hear her voice. I asked her what she wanted me to tell you all, and took notes on what she said. Here's what's happening according to Grace......

1. Two exterior drains were inserted into the abcess last night. They did their job and were removed this morning.

2. "There are not enough cuss words in the English language to express the pain caused by the removal of those drains." That's a direct quote from my beloved Best Friend. She even invented a new word. I'd share it with you, but she said we'd probably shock too many readers. So, just know that this tough as steel woman was in serious pain. But she made it.

3. This has been really traumatic for her emotionally, and Grace said it goes way above and beyond dealing with back labor without an epidural when Bee was born. She's had a tough time sleeping.

4. Social Services provided information about help available for people without prescription insurance. Ironically, many of the organizations offering help are churches. I won't explain the irony here. Go to my blog if you want to figure it out. If you are reading this and are from Grace's church, by all means, go to my blog. I'm Inkling. Read it. Do something.

5. Grace will probably get to go home tomorrow! She is on major antibiotics for ten more days, and will also be on Crohn's medication. The hospital is going to give her three free days worth of Crohn's medication, but after that, it will cost them out of their own pockets. This medication must be taken three times a day, which means a total of 9 pills daily. You read that right. Nine pills for just one day's prescription. God, we need You to do Your thing here. Those pills don't grow on trees, and neither does the money required to pay for them.

In my opinion, Grace is one courageous and amazing woman. I love her to pieces and am thanking God that she is a fighter and is who she is. She has a long road ahead of her, especially with the after-effects of this. We are all praying that God does something amazing, that justice happens, and that Grace and Smart Guy are given the provision they need and deserve.

Grace sends her hellos, and I know she's grateful to have such a caring blog family. She may be the one giving the next update. Let's hope for that!

Thursday, March 29, 2007

Update #1

Inkling here. I jumped when the phone rang a bit ago, but it was my dad. He's STILL talking to Henry David, even though I mentioned that I'm waiting for a phone call and we don't have call waiting. Ugh. Anyway....we have an update thanks to Smart Guy. Here's his comment for you.....

Hey. I just got back from the hospital - there is no room for me to sleep. She (Grace) is sound asleep with great drugs going in her body.

She had surgery at 8 pm et and it lasted for about 90 mins. I talked to the doc via the phone ( another story ) and he said that it was not pretty at all in there.

However, they think they are able to drain everything properly. We will know more in the next 24 hours.

From the insurance end, no this is not going to be covered with the coverage we have but we will find a way to make it work.

I will share openly that I am ticked right now with the whole situation and feeling terrible. If she was on the meds she should have been on - this most likely would have not happened.

I will share more tomorrow afternoon when I am around a comp. I am sure Grace will try to be in contact with some of you.

Ruby, I am sorry I missed you and I can not retreive msgs so I did not know how late was too late.

Smart Guy
The Hubby

I Love You Grace. I know you will not see this till you are "semi-recovered"


Hi all. This is Sara Orange/Inkling here. Grace asked me to post what's going on. Here goes.....

Grace was admitted to the hospital today. As she has mentioned, she has Crohn's disease. It is no longer in "remission" and is acting up. She has a 5 cm abcess that is infected. She is on a heavy-duty antibiotic that we are hoping will kill the infection. I just hung up with Grace and her mom as the doctors came to get her for surgery to drain the abcess.

She is in a lot of pain and very sick. We need to PRAY.

I have no idea what this will mean for insurance and finances for them, but know that their insurance situation is not the greatest. I am not certain this will be covered, due to their unique situation. (I'm being very kind and controlling my very opinionated tongue at this point, though I'd like to wax eloquent on their situation. Someday, I will. I may even kick somebody. But today is not the day.) We just need to pray.

If I hear any more news, I'll let you know. Or she may have her mom or her hubby update here. I don't know.

Saturday, March 24, 2007

A Little Freedom Allowed

I just let my boys walk over to the little grocery store in town by themselves to get a pack of gum. It felt wierd, but this is the place to let them have a little freedom. I was riding over there all the time to get stuff at their age. Things just seem different now!! They're back and they're still alive. I can now relax!

Spring is Here

When we got out of the car at Mom and Dad's at 10:00 last night, we could here the frogs croaking... I love that sound. Dad, Prophet, and D.K. are sleeping in the camper tonight(Probably Bee too when she finds out and cries pathetic enough to her Paw)... which means it's finally warm enough to do so without freezing you bahooney off. Yeah, Spring!

Bee Quote

Yesterday, upon her return to the toilet five minutes after pouring into said toilet the remaining four orange bath fizzies in the container and then walking away to let happen what would surely happen, here is what Bee said.....

"Well, that sure is funky, isn't it?"

The only way you can possibly not think that's funny is if you've never loved a four-year-old before... or maybe you just had to be there. It was a most funky orange color. Consider the fact that one of those bath fizzies is supposed to color an entire tub-full of water and she put four of them into the small amount of water in the commode. It was surely funky!

Thursday, March 22, 2007

Random Grace Strikes Again

Well, it's been an emotional day. We finally have a settlement. The papers and the checks are all signed. The checks are sitting in our lawyers account to be sure they clear before they are put into our accounts. We actually settled for less than our lawyer and the mediator thought we should have gotten, but we just want it done with. We do not want to sue them or go to court.

Prophets class is having a "celebrate spring break" pizza party for lunch tomorrow. I volunteered to send in scotcheroos (Prophet's fav) for the party. I just finished them 30 minutes ago. I'll have to get up early tomorrow morning to cut the boogers, as they are torture to cut into squares once they've set up.

Tomorrow is my Smart Guy's 35th birthday. We're going over to Mom and Dad's to go out to dinner at Famous Dave's. For those that don't know, that's a BBQ restaurant. For all you southerners that doubt the quality of any kind of BBQ made in the midwest, I don't blame you a bit. But this place is awesome. It's a different style than my fav place in Birmingham, which was The Full Moon. They had awesome baked beans, with a very rich dark brown sauce and a vinegar based cole-slaw that was awesome piled on top on the sandwich. Okay, so I'm getting a little homesick for AL thinking about it. Hopefully Famous Dave's will satisfy Smart Guys craving for really good pork tomorrow night. The kids and I are staying the rest of the weekend and Smart Guy is coming back to get us on Monday.

We leave for Nashville, TN on Tuesday afternoon to head to Cleanin' Cuz's house until Saturday. We haven't been there since last February and I'm really looking forward to going. When we lived in AL, we saw each other every couple months between us stopping for the night on the way to IL to visit, girls' weekends, and everyone coming to our place for the occasional visit. It's funny, as kids Cleanin' Cuz and I fought alot, but as adults I love her dearly and cherish her a friend and cousin. They have two kids. The oldest is June. She's five and her and Bee are both about to bust with anticipation over seeing one another. Bee has been packing for two weeks. The other morning, when we all tried to brush our teeth after breakfast, all of our toothbrushes were gone. I couldn't figure out where they were to save my life. All the sudden I had a thought and asked Bee if she had packed them. She had. She is one prepared little girl. June is also looking forward to Bee's visit. Cleanin' Cuz says she's been laying out Bee's bed on her bedroom floor for awhile now. I love that they know each other well enough to look forward to visits. I remember growing up and not likeing my third cousins because Cleanin' Cuz and I thought they were a bunch of snots when we got together for our once a year Christmas gathering of the entire clan.

I talked to Ruby today. Little Miss (the baby) slept for six hours straight last night... a record. Unfortunately Ruby had an old friend over with her kids last night and after they got all the kids to bed, they stayed up and talked until 1 am. Little Miss of course woke up less than two hours after Ruby had gone to bed. Ruby says, oh well, at least they got in a good child-free visit. Maybe now that we've got this settlement I can get my train ticket and go see them for a few days.

Speaking of.... now I can go get my passport applied for and then hopefully when that's back I can get out to see my Inkling. (sound possesive... oh well...sometimes I just feel that way). It's killing me because they weren't home this evening when I tried to call and tell her what we settled for. UGH!

Have I ever mentioned that my mom's kinda, sorta a hippie kind of person. If her profession weren't enough to tell you that, her favorite shoes are Birkies and my parents have owned two different Volkswagon campers, both complete with pop-up camp tops. That's what I grew up camping in. My spot was up in the pop-up. Anyway, growing up we spent much time in "the healthfood store" as my brother and I called it. There was a small one close to us and a much larger and better one a little further away. I can remember going when I was a kid and getting my soy ice cream treats and sitting on the front steps outside eating it while Mom and Dad finished shopping. I can also vividly remember the smell of the place. A combination of fresh-baked whole grain breads, vitamins, teas, and all the bulk stuff in bins. No matter how often I walk into "the healthfood store", whereever it may be, they all smell exactly the same and for myself, it is the ultimate in relaxing and comforting. I don't shop their real often myself. Between the fact that they are usually outrageously expensive and the growing availability of healthy and organic stuff in your mainstream storms, and the fact that it's in an inconvenient spot. I do have a problem with my conscious though when I buy that stuff at Walmart instead of giving the little guys they money, but when I can get a box of Kashi cereal for $2.45 or so at Wally World and they have it almost five bucks at "the healthfood store", it's really hard on the budget to give it to the little man. Anyway, I had to go in the other day with all three kids. I usually do it when they're all in school or when I'm doing my grocery shopping in the evening without them. I had to laugh because when we walked into the store, the very first thing they all said was "This place smells like Grannie's house." Told ya she was a hippie. Her house even smells healthy. By the way, if I ever find out that any of you have fed your children whole-wheat, carob-chip cookies, I will turn you in to the proper authorities. Our mother fed them to us and they are NOT a substitute for chocolate-chip cookies. They are nasty things...yes we were tortured as children. Nobody at school would ever swap with us when we had those nasty things. (I love you Mom)

Smart Guy and Bee had a father/child party at her school this evening. It was a wild-west theme. The kids had made cowboy hats and vests for themselves earlier in the week and they made their daddies hats during the party.

I got my haircut this evening. It looks good... now if only I could get rid of all these stinkin' zits. I look like I'm 14 again.

It's raining here. Actually it's storming. I'm watching the lightening and listening to the thunder as I type. I think I've mentioned before that I love a good storm. When Katrina came thru when we lived in AL, I was giddy. Yah, I know stupid, but me nevertheless. I used to love it when it stormed while I was at school as a kid. I have a secret ambition to be one of those crazy nut cases that drive around chasing tornadoes. I think they're nuts, but I so totally understand the high they get from it all.

We went out to dinner tonight. Rarely do we do this, so it's always a special treat. I have a half of a chicken-salad croissant waiting for me for lunch tomorrow afternoon. It's calling my name right now though, so it may not make it until tomorrow. D.K. and his appetite have pretty much outgrown the kid menus at most restaurants. He ended up helping Prophet finish his dinner. The child is gonna eat us out of house and home when he's a teenager. I've never seen two young boys eat so much. The other night I made a 9 X 13 casserole dish (a double recipe) of Bisquick's cheeseburger pie for dinner. It was gone! We have five people in our family, and I only had a small piece. The boys each had at least four good-sized helpings. Bee had three herself. They're a bunch of piglets!

Well, I've rambled long enough... time for bed... hopefully this will post tonight! Probably won't get on here tomorrow because of my schedule... so I'll be back Saturday sometime most likely. Good night!

*once again this won't post tonight, so we'll try again in the morning.

Forgiveness...Forgiveness...Even If...Even If ...You Haven't Asked For It

*this was written last night aroun 10:00. it wouldn't post or save as draft, so it had to be copied and pasted this morning, so the date and time are wrong... so "tonight" is last night and "tomorrow" is today.

"If Jesus can forgive crucifixion then surely we can survive and find a resolution"

That is a line from artist India Arie's song "Wings of Forgiveness". Tonights theme for our Wednesday night worship service was forgiveness. How ironic that three days after the nine month anniversary of our wreck and the evening before what will hopefully be our final mediation that I should have "forgiveness" staring me in the face. This is something I've thought about alot in the last nine months. During the couple months after the wreck, I wanted nothing to do with forgiveness. The anger I had felt good, it got me thru, if that makes any sense. I thrived on it. I hated the man who irresponsibly put myself and my children in his path of destruction. I cried alot. I can remember actually telling people that I was not ready to forgive him yet, but I knew that one day I'd have to. I remember saying that it would happen in one of two ways.... I would either wake up one morning and just know that it was time or I would wake up one morning and realize that I didn't hate him anymore.

Have I forgiven him? Wow, when I really think about that question, I'm not sure. I don't hate him anymore, but I certainly don't want to befriend the guy. I still want an apology from him that I'm sure will never come. I don't think about him and all the things I'd like to say and do to him every second I'm awake anymore. Last summer there was no punishment to horrible for him. I didn't give a "rats-ass" about the guy. I would actually sit and think about what I'd say to him if I was ever face to face with him. I was obsessed with seeing him pay for what he'd done to us... more emotionally than physically. I will never be the same person. That wreck changed me. I now have a flashback that lingers in my mind and flashes at the oddest times. I don't have just an emotional reaction, but also a physical one. My entire body from head to toe reacts. It's the strangest reaction. I now put more miles on my car and use more gas because I pretty much refuse to drive on the interstate. I now have three young children who know what it feels like to hang upside down in a car and relive it everytime I have to hit the brakes because the light turns yellow or I go over a bump or railroad tracks faster than they think I should.

Forgiveness when your still in the midst of emotionally healing from a trauma is very hard. I think I'm on my way. I mean surely the simple fact that I'm no longer planning the Indiana University student's dimise means I'm on my way to forgiving him... or does it? Does the fact that I still think he's a moron mean that I'm still holding a grudge? Because I do. I probably always will. What he did was preventable and he didn't prevent it. Can you forgive a person and still think them a fool? I've struggled with this for awhile and I still don't know.

So, tomorrow we finally go to our mediation with our lawyer to hopefully get the final sum that we will recieve for all of this. Our medical bills still haven't been paid. After four ambulance rides, four emergency room visits, four CAT-scans, a few more x-rays, an 18 hour stay in the ER, a three day stay at Children's in Indi, and then all the follow-up visits afterwards, our bills came to a grand total of about $25,000! All that money for something that took approximately 5 seconds to happen. Amazing! That's our good 'ole American medical system for ya, but that's a topic for another post altogether. Hopefully when we walk out of there tomorrow we will have totally settled that part of it. I don't know, maybe that will help me to move on. I won't have to think about that part anymore, so maybe I'll think about it with less stress.

So, have I forgiven him yet? No... I guess I haven't, but I'm healing inside. The flashback jolts don't come as often and I did drive on the interstate for about 30 minutes a couple weeks ago. It was awful, but I did it. At least I'm not so filled with the hate anymore. I would like for him to look me in the eyes and say he's sorry, but I have to get over that. I know I have to forgive him... afterall, if Jesus can forgive crucifixcion, I can surely forgive something that didn't cause death or permanent damage to any of us.

Please pray for me (and Smart Guy) as we go into the mediation tomorrow. I tend to be very blubbery where this topic is concerned when my kids are mentioned. If the truth be told, I think my lawyer's counting on that very thing. I can also be a very nasty and mouthy person when I get my dander up. So please pray that I keep my temper and that everything goes smooth as a New York cheesecake (whatever, don't know where that came from lol).

Goodnight, y'all! I love you guys!

Tuesday, March 20, 2007

Nothing Worse Than Burnt Microwave Popcorn

The microwave zapped a bag of popcorn Saturday night. I think something's wrong with the microwave, because we blew a circuit switch when it happened. Sunday morning while I was sitting in Sunday school, I started wondering who had just smoked before they came into class, and then I realized it was the smell of my house soaked into my clothes. Yuck! The tissues in our bathroom smelled like smoke when I blew my nose this morning. My coat stinks. I guess it's soaked into everything. Better go invest in some super-strength Febreeze and smelly candles!

That's my exciting news for now! Later Taters!

Friday, March 16, 2007


Guess what I discovered while I was doing Bee's hair this morning in preparation to go to the boys' school for their awards ceremony? Bee not only gave Bowz a haircut, she also cut her own hair. She cut a chunk of it under the long part on top so I didn't notice it until I pulled part of the top up into a rubberband. Needless to say, she had her beloved "Noggin" taken away for the day. Nope, no TV for Bee today. As soon as I noticed it and asked if she had cut her hair, she said "I'm so sorry Mommy."

What next? I have yet to find the hair anywhere. I'm sure she's got it hidden somewhere! Well, I've been a mom for 9 1/2 years and was a nanny for about 3 years before that and no one ever cut their hair before now... of course Bee is the first girl I've ever had the pleasure to raise, before my own boys, all my little charges were also boys....hmmmm! Yep, Bee is definitely the most high maintenance child I have ever loved!

Who Did That?

Guess who has a very short spot cut into his hair this morning? That would be Bowzer. Apparently someone found a little pair of scissors and decided to see what they would do to the dog. When asked if anyone knew what had happened to the dog this morning, Bee promptly turned her face into the back of her chair and told us that she didn't want to talk about it... aha, well there's the guilty party right there. When I asked her where the scissors were currently residing, she told me that she wasn't going to tell me... excuse me, little girlfriend we don't operate that way in this house. When her daddy told her that she would be in severe trouble if she talked that way again and I threatened to take away her dollies, she immediately produced them from under her bed.

Apparently after I put her to bed last night, she went into our bathroom and got into my stuff. She pulled out a little tiny pair of scissors from a sewing kit that I had bought last May when we went to Inkling's wedding and gave poor, unsuspecting Bowzer a trim while he snoozed in her room.

Thursday, March 15, 2007


I am officially sick and tired of hacking up a lung every 5 seconds or so around the clock. I actually feel much better and my cough isn't crackly and full of junk anymore, but my nose is still runny and this cough is about to put me in the looney bin. I really want to take the strong nighttime cough stuff, but I can't until Smart Guy gets home... I don't like the only adult in the house to be knocked-out... so I guess I'll continue coughing for a couple more hours. UGH!

Okay, done complaining! Thanks!

My Heart

Hey guys! I've missed everyone!! Smart Guy is gone this evening and won't be home until late. Everyone's fed, bathed, read to, prayed with, tucked in, and kissed goodnight! It's finally quiet in my house. All the lights are off, so I can't see the mess that's around, so I'm gonna pretend it's not there for the next little while and actually post about what's been on my mind and heart.

Lately, for a few months, I've been feeling like there is something that I need to be doing. I've been growing more and more restless working with teenagers in the local church. The majority of the kids we work with were born in the church. They are rude, apathetic, and seemingly stuck on being average teens instead of amazing disciples for Christ. Not all of them, but a bunch. I feel the need to focus on one hurting kid. Feeling the need to focus on one and making a big difference rather than spreading it out and hoping to possibly make a small difference.

I finally think I've discovered who that child is. She's actually in our church. She's one of those kids whose been there for a long-time, but she's different. She's always smiling on the outside. Inside, she's a nightmare. Her parents truely do not think that what she's being tormented with inside her is something to be taken seriously. She has a form of OCD. OCD is the #2 reason that young people committ suicide. Second only to eating disorders. My heart breaks for her. I want to help her. I want to love on her and show her the love of her Heavenly Father. He understands. What I don't understand, is how a parent can not take this incredible hurt of their child so seriously that it causes them pain inside too.

I guess my biggest revelation today has been that I don't have to go far to find that hurting person who I'm feeling pulled toward. She's been right under my nose since we got here last June. She's a willing person. She loves to be loved on. She doesn't shy away from a hug. She's aching for help and understanding. She yearns for someone to say she's not just being a drama queen. She's not.

Pray for me please. Pray for her please. Pray for her parents please. Her life could do a major flip flop if her parents would just accept that it's real and not something she's doing for attention.

Anyway, I've gotta get some stuff done before I retire to the bedroom to put today's laundry away! Goodnight friends!

Casting Crowns

I have a very heavy heart right now... this song is exactly what I'm talking about. There has to be something we can do to help the "untouchables".

Wednesday, March 14, 2007

Okay, so I just wanted to let everyone know that , yes I am still alive. I'm bored with blogging at the moment. I'm still reading everyone else everyday, I just haven't had anything to say or the time to even think about it. Between work, (church and Billy Boy), being sick still, the beautiful weather that is calling us me out of the house, and going to bed fairly early since I've been under the weather, once I read everyone's posts, I don't have any desire to sit and write. Sorry, maybe I'm just get my addiction under control. Maybe I'll get caught up this weekend!!

Just know that I haven't forgotten anyone and I love y'all..... and to every midwestern friend out there... ain't this weather the most amazing gift God could give us after the winter we had just a month ago... I'm trying not to think about the 20 something degrees that will be back during the night in a few days! Let's just enjoy it while we can!! With my love, Grace

Saturday, March 10, 2007

It's Back

Well, my comment does appear to be there now. It's #1207. Apparently it was something in the cyber world that caused it to appear and then disappear a couple times yesterday. Thanks for your prayers and words of encouragement while I went through my "drama queen" moments yesterday. I now pray that my words reach the ears that are in need of hearing them and that they are open to listening.

Well, Prophet's basketball game starts in less than two hours and I've still gotta get everyone ready. Later.... by the way, I'm feeling considerably better... thanks for the prayers.

Friday, March 9, 2007

As Expected

Well, as I kinda, sorta, but hoped not, thought, my comment on the "Moms for Modesty" blog appears to already be deleted by the author. Unfortunately this just proves my point even more. The "founders" of "Moms for Modesty" were okay with leaving a comment that puts down and judges other human beings, but when someone tried to point out the error of it and show another way of thinking it appears to have been zapped. I'm hoping that I'm wrong and that it suddenly reappears the next time I check, but I'm not hopeful. I'm saddened that are people out their that are so willing to judge. I guess it shouldn't surprise me though, that was me in the not so distant past.

While I really believe in what the "Moms for Modesty" mission statement says, I am honestly thinking about removing the button from my sidebar if my comment doesn't show-up again. Please believe me when I say that's it's not because I'm throwing a temper tantrum over "my" comment appearring to be deleted. It's because of the comment that wasn't deleted, but allowed to stay. I don't want to be associated with an "orginazation" that allows sanctimonious Christians to spew filth that doesn't show love to everyone.

I'm struggling with feeling judgemental myself towards this whole situation at the moment. Am I doing what I'm angry at them for doing or am I simply standing up for people?

I hate this. God never intended for his people to become so..... hateful, spiteful, sanctimonious, self-righteous, judgemental, or just plain mean. What has happened to us as Christians that it's okay to see a young girl walk into a church building wearing a skimpy shirt and we just turn around and go somewhere else that morning to "evangelize" (whatever that's so supposed to mean)? Looks to me that they had a perfect oppurtunity to "evangelize" standing right there in front of them.... and then to suggest or joke that it would even possibly be okay in Jesus' eyes to advertise with a sign that one should dress modestly to be welcomed in the church. Personally I don't want to attend a church like that. Do I want to see teenage girls in belly-shirts at church? Of course not, but I'd rather they be there and then teach them (with respect for them and what they've been thru or who they are and in a loving Jesus-like manner)to respect themselves and love the person God made them to be, than for them to not be there at all and just looked at as a skanky-dressed teenage girl. How utterly sad that the world I've claimed to be a part of has come to that.

I pray that my comment comes back up, it may renew my faith in Christians some, we'll see.

Beware Any Self-Righteous Christians Out There... You Won't Like This Post

Many of you have surely seen the "Moms for Modesty" button in the sidebar of many blogs. I'm adding it to my sidebar also. I fully believe in what they stand for.
Moms for Modesty Mission Statement

* As a Mom for Modesty I believe in common-sense modesty for girls and young women.
* I believe in refraining from sexualizing our girls and young women.
* I believe that it is unwise and unfair to taunt boys and young men by permitting my daughter(s) to dress in an immodest manner.
* I believe that true beauty comes from within and I strive to teach my daughter(s) this truth.
* I will loyally shop at retailers that provide girls’ and young womens clothing that is modest, affordable and stylish.

To sign their petition, go here and leave a comment. They currently have 1206 comments left, me being the 1206th. As I read thru some of the comments left, I was angered by one of them, here it is...

"Thanks so much for taking this (needed) stand!!! We have a 13 yo daughter who is very modest. We’re so thankful for that. We also have two young boys (7, 4) and they’ve been taught what’s modest and what’s immodest. You wouldn’t believe (perhaps you will) what we saw at church yesterday. A teenaged girl wore a very tight & very short (bikini-like) shirt (showing her belly button and lots of skin). We don’t understand how her parents could allow her to dress like that (to church even!) When my husband saw this young girl walking into the church, he decided to take our 2 older kids to the park nearby to evangelize, instead. I took our youngest to the kids’ Sunday School class because I was a teacher’s helper.We were joking that perhaps we should hold up a huge sign in front of the church and maybe on the sidewalks with these words, "Please dress modestly! Thank you!" What do you think? :)"

Comment by "A" September 4, 2006

What kind of vibe does everyone else out there get from this comment? Personally this comment made me quiver inside. I'm actually still shaking from the anger it caused in me. Why would anyone ever want to come to church knowing that "this" is who they could run into? Here's what my comment said when I also added my name to the "Mom's for Modesty" statement...

"I gladly add my name to your list. I’m the mama of one little girl and two young boys, and also the wife of a youth pastor. For thirteen years now I’ve watched as young girls have become increasingly less modest, even the ones in the church. I believe the church should be the one place where our young boys should not have to be tempted at all times. We have got to TEACH our young girls to love themselves enough to have respect for themselves. Unfortunately in todays society immodesty is just a part of life and JUDGING them doesn’t do any good. As Christians we have to assume that we are the only ones they may have to teach them to set the standards high for themselves and their friends. I feel sorry for young girls of mothers who don’t teach them otherwise, because there’s a large number of grown-ups that judge them by their appearance and assume they are little floozies and such, when in reality they’ve just never had anyone love them enough to show them anything different. Please don’t judge them, love them. The reason for the tone of this post comes from one of the posts back in September some time. It was very judgemental and is the exact reason many, many, many teenagers stay away from the church, which is precisely where they ought to be, but who wants to be there if they think they will be judged the second they walk thru the doors."

Comment by Grace — March 9, 2007

I wouldn't be surprised if it gets taken off the list, although the only people they told not to leave a comment were the people who didn't agree with them... well, I agree with them, I just don't agree with "A". I'm so sick of these perfect Christians these days who probably wouldn't know who Jesus was if he was standing 2 inches in front of their faces breathin' on 'em. Jesus loves everyone. Jesus invites everyone. Jesus forgives everyone. Jesus certainly would never stand on the street and tell anyone that they weren't allowed to talk to him if they were dressed a certain way. Where on earth do these people get this in their little heads? Well, anyway, I'm done now.

Let's all pray for "A". Personally for myself, the only way I can get over the anger I have for someone is by praying for them. Someone once told me "You can't hate someone that you're praying for". (not that I "hate" her, just frustrated with her line of thinking) Thanks Ruby, that advice has done me lots of good over the years.

Thursday, March 8, 2007


I have gone to Wally World and bought nighttime medicine, zinc lozenges, saline spray, and shower soothers. I canceled the Children's museum trip tomorrow, hated to but the thought of walking around that HUGE place makes me wanna take a nap. I turned up the heat and now I'm going upstairs, where Smart Guy has already read to everyone for bedtime, swallowing my drugs, turning on the shower, throwing in a shower soother thingy, getting into the hot shower and hoping those things are as wonderful as they sound, squirting saline up my nose several times and then collapsing into my bed that will be warm because of the heating pad that has been placed under the blankets before I got into the shower. Goodnight, I love you all! I pray that you and yours don't get this stuff... it's awful!!

D.K. Makes Me Think

D.K.- Taylor and I have decided to live together in Alabama when we grow-up.

Mom- Are you planning on marrying her?

D.K.- No, why?

Mom - Because a man can't live with a woman he isn't married to unless it's his mom, sister, or wife of someone else he's living with.

D.K.- But mommy what if she's just poor and needs a place to live?

Mom - uuuuuuuummmmmmmmmmmmm

Calgon, Take Me Away

Well, I guess it's time to update since it's been four days. Apparently I've learned to control my addiction finally or maybe I'm just busy. Actually this week I've been sick. It started last Saturday when I woke-up coughing up a lung, but I didn't feel bad. Then Sunday I woke-up with hardly any voice, but I still didn't feel bad. Then around 6:00 that night I suddenly felt like I had run into a brick-wall at 70 mph. When we got home from church I climbed onto the couch with a blanket and let Smart Guy do bedtime alone. Monday morning I got out of bed long enough to see that the boys got up and got dressed and then sent them downstairs to get their own breakfast. I figured getting breakfast on your own occasionally builds character, but I still felt guilty. I closed the stairs gate, put on Noggin for Bee and climbed wearily back into my still-warm side of the bed and only got up one more time before noon (to feed my daughter her breakfast). By that time, I actually felt much better so I got up, showered, and assumed the worst was over. Wrong. I sailed thru the rest of Monday and Tuesday until around 8:30 pm simply coughing and talking like a frog. Then it hit me again. Except this time, my nose started running like a faucet and my cough got worse. So I crawled into bed, but I couldn't fall asleep. I actually was awake until after midnight that night. Yesterday I had Billy Boy and Dora both, so I drug my sorry butt out of bed and got dressed. I sneezed about 200 times during the day yesterday, usually in groups of at least 5 or 6 sneezes at a time. I had to clean the preschool yesterday afternoon, so I went over and did a quick job... empty trash, clean little-boy pee off the toilets, and dust-bustered the snack crumbs... which by the way drive me crazy. There is no reason that three and four-year-old children shouldn't be expected to clean up the crumbs that they drop on the floor and they shouldn't be allowed to get away with it. Sorry, pet peave. I had Smart Guy get me a plate of dinner when he went thru the line and bring it back to me and I sat in seclusion and ate it. Actually it was kinda nice. It was totally quiet and no one knew where I was except Smart Guy. I came home went straight back to bed, it was about 8:00 and got up around 7:30 this morning. I feel a little better this morning, but we'll see what evening brings tonight.

I once again have Billy Boy and Dora. They are playing in the living room next to me as I type. Bee is at school. She'll be home around 11:30. I'll go over to the church to clean for the weekend this evening around 4:30.

Mrs. Music, Dora, Bee, and myself are all going to the Indianapolis Children's museum tomorrow. You're all invited if you wanna come, it'll be a grand time. Only problem is that THE PLAYSCAPE is closed, which was what we had planned on using the most. They are doing the annual cleaning all week long. Wouldn't you know it! Oh well, there's a ton of other things to do there. The cool part is that we get free-carousel rides with our membership so as long as none of us start throwing up, we can ride as much as we like. Smart Guy has issues with the carousel, he starts turning green just standing in line while the carousel goes around next to him. He's that boring grown-up that you see riding on the bench instead of standing up next to their child. As you can see, he doesn't get much sympathy from me, I think it's funny that a grown-man can't stand to go around in circles a few times.

Well, gotta run for now. Later!

Monday, March 5, 2007

Happy Anniversary Smart Guy

Thirteen years ago today, I became Mrs. Smart Guy. I can't believe it's been that long already.

We met the very first day I was on campus at the same small Christian college that Farmwife and Inkling also attended. I was there for Freshmen orientation. I have no clue why Smart Guy was already there, as he was a junior and not due to be there for another two days. But not only was he on campus, he was participating in all the goofy games and such they had us little freshmen doing. The older sister of a church camp friend who was also attending the same school introduced us that day. (the older sister was supposed to be there, as she was helping with the freshmen) We talked some and he claims that I followed him around like a puppy dog. Whatever!

Two days later, we ended up sitting next to one another in a missions class. We chatted while we waited for class to start and he asked me out. That afternoon he found out that the counselor who had told him that the missions class from the college he'd
attended for a year and a half didn't count at this one, didn't know what she was talking about.... so he dropped the class.

The next night we went on our first date. We drove to the city 30 minutes away, went to a movie, and got something to eat. When we got back to campus, he kissed me in the gazebo... Farmwife and Inkling, you know where I'm talking about.

We spent the next several months spending almost every waking moment together... except when we were in class. We ate breakfast together many times a week, sat together in chapel, ate lunch together, he drove me to work, we ate dinner together, played pool together, "studied" together, walked together, and ordered pizza for "picnics" on the floor outside my dorm hallway (guys and girls were forbidden on one another dorm floors). When we said goodnight to each other and then walked the 30 seconds we each had back to our dorm rooms, we would call each other when we got there to talk more. I think we drove poor Inkling crazy the year we roomed together.

On Super Bowl Sunday 1993, my dad and Smart Guy were watching the game together when Smart Guy asked my dad if he could marry me. He said "Sure, but your asking the wrong person."

The next week I was very sick with a cold (much like I am now) and missed several days of classes. The day I finally managed to drag my sorry butt to chapel, I was tired, still not feeling great, and facing a make-up test later that day, Smart Guy asked me to walk back to his dorm with him for some strange reason. I told him no, I was too tired to walk that far... so he got down on one knee right there in the chapel hallway and proposed to me. Suddenly I felt a little better and mustered up the energy to walk over to his dorm. That evening, we drove home to tell my parents.

Our first wedding date was set for June 18, 1994. After a couple of months, we moved it up to December 18, 1993. Unfortunately in August of 1993, we broke-up. Smart Guy suddenly became nervous that I didn't have what it takes to be a minister's wife and the willingness to follow him around the country if the occasion called for it. The ridiculous part is that nobody on campus ever knew we had broke-up. We were still together all the time. We had forgotten to take our names off the married-student-housing list and one Saturday morning while we sat in the cafeteria eating breakfast, a staff member came in and told us that our apartment was open and one of us could move in that day. So Smart Guy moved in. We set the wedding date for March 5, 1994 and started planning our wedding again. I made him sleep on the couch in our new apartment, because I didn't want him to sleep in "our" bed without me too.

So, on March 5, 1994, after being together for only 19 months, we got married. I was 19 and Smart Guy was 21. Two very young and very different people started their lives together.

When I think back, I realize how young we actually were. I mean, common sense told me that we were only 19 and 21, but at that age one doesn't think that to be young. I think the biggest challenge in front of us though was how absolutely different we were. We were raised in very different parts of the country, by very different parents. Not to mention that we are just simply wired as opposites.

We spent the first four years of our marriage getting to know one another's quirks. We argued alot, about stupid stuff mostly. Then there came a point where we finally grew-up and quit arguing... We became parents for the first time around that time.

Nowadays, we seldom argue. That fight (that I started) we had back in December was the last argument we've had and it had been a long time before that since the last one. We're best-friends. He's my life. I love him more today than I ever have. He loves me and is committed to me for the rest of his life. He takes care of me and if the truth be told, he spoils me in alot of ways. Sometimes I wonder how he has put up with me for so long. I cannot believe we've been sharing life for this long. I feel like our wedding day was just a short while ago and now here we are... three kids, four pets, seven church positions and crazy church boards, eleven cars, thirteen homes, a zillion medical bills, loads of love and laughter, and even more patience later and we're one of the best couples that I know.

I love my life. Yah, we've been to hell and back a couple of times, but we always come back better people. Would I want to rewind and do it all again? Well, a few things I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy... but those things have changed us and made us better... they've made us lean on God and each other even more. Nah, I don't think I'd want to rewind and do it again, but I also wouldn't change any of it. It's been quite a ride.

As for the getting married so young part? Some people look at their lives when they marry young and say they changed after they grew-up and grew into very different people. Personally, we grew-up together. We learned everything there is to know about being grown-ups together. We've never known anything but being together. That's who we are. We are Smart Guy and Grace and always will be.

Thank you "Poochie" for being mine for thirteen years today. I absolutely cannot imagine my life without you next to me. I thank our Father Above that your counselor put you in the wrong missions class for that first day of class. I love you so incredibly much!!

Friday, March 2, 2007

Look At That Form

This is Prophet shooting a basket in last Saturday's basketball game. He's the one on the right in the black shirt! Look at the follow-thru on that shot... which he made. He was very pleased with himself and clapped as he ran back down the court!! Way to go, Prophet!!

The Snow

I just swiped this off my hubby's blog. This is our house after the snowstorm a couple weeks ago. Notice the depth of the wall alongside the blue van on the left. It was at two feet deep there. Those piles on either side of the driveway are still there, but now they're nasty looking and slushy. Yuck!! It sure was pretty right after it happened though! Keep in mind that we got even more a few days later!

Open the Eyes of My Heart Lord

This is what I had the pleasure of listening to Prophet sing as we drove around town tonight!! He loves to sing worship songs whenever he's doing anything!! During worship time at church, he's always the one in the front singing his little lungs out! It's awesome to watch (and hear)! This is done by Streams of Grace

Open the eyes of my heart Lord
Open the eyes of my heart
I want to see You
I want to see You

To see You high and lifted up
Shining in the light of Your glory
Pour out Your power and love
As we sing holy, holy, holy

So When Was The Last Time YOU Were Taken Out By TWO Good-Lookin' Guys At The Same Time?

For me personally, it was just a few hours ago. I picked up the boys from school and asked them if they wanted to go see "A Night At The Museum" and have dinner or go to the school carnival. They both agreed (miracle of all miracles) that they wanted to see the movie. I was so glad, not only that they agreed, but that they wanted to do something besides the carnival. If the truth be told, those things drive me nuts...a bunch of kids (and grown-ups) running the halls with all the normal school rules seemingly thrown out the window for the that cost a dollar a piece (some more) that costs $2.50 a slice.... and did I mention the unruly, very wound-up kids. I like my own kids... other people's kids... well let's just say that there's a reason I married a youth minister and not a children's minister. I love my friend's children, they're like family, but out in public most children make me crazy. I know, I'm horrible.

Anyway, I picked up the boys from school at 3:30, dropped Bee off with Mrs. Music and Dora (Mr. Music is with Smart Guy in AL, he's the music minister at our church), and headed to the movie theatre. We paid for our tickets and got in line for our bucket of extremely overpriced and very buttery popcorn, 1 Wonka bar, and a big Mountain Dew. We made our way to the our theatre, chose from any seat we wanted as there was only about 8 other people there at there at the time and sat down. I originally sat between them, but as soon as they finished their shared Wonka bar, they both dove into the popcorn bucket, that I wasn't eating from because I do not like popcorn, that was sitting in my lap and for about five minutes I sat there with two little hands coming at me from either side. I finally switched places with Prophet and gave him the bucket so they weren't both reaching in front of me. The movie was really good. There was only one "bad word" in it that I caught and while it could have easily been replaced with something much more kid-friendly, I admit that I did laugh when it was said. The boys were hilarious. They kept telling the characters what to do and what not to do in their regular voices for all to hear. D.K.'s favorite part was of course the T-rex skeleton that came to life every single night and chased one of his own rib bones around the museum like a dog. Prophet's favorite part was close to the end when two little 2-inch tall characters who originally hated each other were thought to be dead and then they suddenly showed up alive and being friends. We'll be getting that one on DVD when it comes out.

When we came out of the movie, we all had to use the restroom. Now, this poses a problem when your boys are the age of mine... too old to take into the ladies restroom with me, but still young enough that it makes me very nervous to let them go into the men's restroom by themselves. Thankfully there's two of them, that makes me feel better. They go in the same stall, play swords and come out together. I always tell them to scream if anyone touches or grabs them. The problem is that being boys they got in and out much quicker than myself who had to wait for about four other women in line in front of me. By the time I came out, I could hear my blond, little dates for the evening beating the tar out of each other, in the name of brotherly fun of course, out in the hallway. When I came out I realized they were acting out a battle scene from the movie. There was a grandma-type woman standing there watching them and giggling. She told us she'd already seen the movie once and that this time she brought her husband with her to see it. The boys told her they were on a date with me and I bragged about having a date with two guys at one time. I think she thought I was crazy by the look she gave me. After that we took a vote on dinner and ended up going to Taco Bell, where D.K. proceeded to scarf down four tacoes. He almost ate a fifth one, but decided that it would be better to stop at four and not risk puking it all up... he's all 8-year-old boy, what can I say!! It was fun to just sit there with nothing to do but talk with them. Like I've said before, sometimes it seems like even though we're together, we're always on the go or doing something specific. I like to slow down and just be with them. It was funny, at first we sat down in a booth. We all opened our tacoes and started eating and then we noticed one of those tall tables with the tall seats. The boys thought it looked cool, so we packed up all our food and moved everything over there to eat. When we finished talking, we put our coats back on, walked out into the bitter-cold wind and went to get Bee.

We are now back home and we're all camping out in the living room for the night. Stuart Little 2 is playing and they have "made" mommy's bed on the couch with my pillow and a blanket. It's beckoning for my body to come warm it up!

"Thank you God for days like today. Thank You for giving me these two precious young men to love and raise for Your glory. Please help me to do right by them and You. Help me always to remember that they are first and foremost Yours and that I am merely a messenger of their Heavenly Father's love for them. Give me the words and actions to always bring You to life in whatever situation we may be thrust into as they grow and mature. Most of all, give me the ability to show them who You are in such a way that they yearn for You and cannot exsist without You in their hearts. I pray that someday they may make wonderful, Christian men to broaden Your kingdom all over the earth."

Untitled (brain is blank)

Well I'm a single mama for the weekend. Smart Guy and the entire church staff left at 7 am this morning for a conference in AL. Fortunately I've got good kids that won't completely put me at my wits end by the time he gets home. Smart Guy usually takes the boys to school, but this morning I had to get up and take them my self since he had already left (yes I'm aware of the fact that I'm spoiled). After we dropped them at school, Bee and I headed to Wally World to get the food for Sunday Night's dinner for the teenagers... sloppy joes, chips, dip, baby carrots, ice cream, and warm cookies. Then we came over to the church to drop off the food in the fridge here and work for a couple hours to get the ed wing ready for services this weekend. I'm sitting in Smart Guys office posting because my computer wouldn't work when I tried to get on at 6:30 this morning. It's snowing a little bit. It's very windy with 40-50 mph wind gusts. We may get an inch or so of snow.

...the person who was SPRC (Staff-Parish Relations Committee) chair person last year when all those promises that weren't kept were made to us, just came in the office to tell me something. She's working in the office answering phones and such since the staff is away. I have to admit that it's very difficult to look her in the eyes right now. I keep waiting for the apology that will probably never come, but oh well. I'm very frustrated this morning... feeling very annoyed at the entire situation... very angry at what may happen. I can't post it all here because of certain lurkers, but will try to get an email out to my blog girls later today to keep you posted.

Anyway, we've got our school carnival tonight. Since I'm doing it alone, Bee is going to Mr. and Mrs. Music and Dora's house to play for the evening. I've watched Dora for them a few times this week because their babysitter quit last week and they havn't found a new sitter yet. They asked me to keep her, but I just can't. I've got enough on my plate. If I add a 2 1/2 year old to the already chaotic mix that is my life, it will be even crazier. I can't fit another carseat into my van. It alreay has one carseat and three boosters in it with Billy Boy's in there too. Walmart trips would be very difficult, whereas with Billy Boy and Bee they are still very doable with those big carts they now have. With Billy Boy and Bee I can still come up to the church and work while they play in another room. I can't do that with Dora because she's still too little to leave in another room playing. She hates the vacuum cleaner with a passion. Everytime I turned it on yesterday, she broke-down in huge crocodile tears until I picked her up to comfort her. I told Mrs. Music that I'd help them out for three weeks until they found a new sitter. I feel guilty in a way, but I know I shouldn't. I'm also quite proud of myself for being able to set up that boundry and not let it down just because she's a friend. But anyway, I told her she didn't have to pay me for yesterday if she'd entertain Bee tonight during the carnival... so we now have an unofficial babysitting co-op going. I can't wait for an entire evening with just my boys. Maybe I'll take them out for dinner too. Maybe I'll ask them if they want to skip the carnival and go see a movie with their mommy! It could be interesting to see which way they decide. Of course, I'm sure one will want the carnival and one will want the movie. We'll see, maybe I won't give them a choice.

Well, I was gonna go down and finish up cleaning for the weekend, but they're down there steam cleaning the carpets. I guess that means I won't have to vacuum today at least. I never posted about it, but last weekend our entire education wing flooded. Each of our classrooms has a low counter with a sink and water fountain on it. Well, sometime after 6:30 last Friday night, the fountain in Bee's preschool classroom popped off. It shot straight up into the air all night long. It shot up so hard that there's a very impressive, 4 inch diameter hole in the ceiling straight above it. Can you imagine if some poor, unsuspecting child had been taking a drink when that happened? The poor little thing would be scarred for life. Normally our ed wing is not used at all on Saturdays. The rest of the building is super busy, but the ed wing stays closed until Sunday morning most of the time. So it's a miracle that someone found the geyser before Sunday morning. There's a ladies knitting group that meets at 8 or so on Saturday morning. One of them needed to use the potty, so instead of going to the main bathrooms, she turned and went to use the family potty in the ed wing. When she walked into the hallway she noticed that the sunlight coming in the ed wing doors was shining off the carpet in the hallway. She thought it looked wierd and went to check it out. It's a miracle that she did, because the wing was under about 4 inches of water at the time. It was a mess to say the least. They immediately got a company in here to suck up the water, and set up fans and dehumidifiers. In all, there were 29 floor fans and 5 dehumidifiers in there. We had to tape the wing off for Sunday morning. We combine 1st thru fifth graders into one classroom, put all the little one's in the two youth rooms above the ed wing and moved the youth to the coffee house room for the morning. All in all, it went off without a hitch. So now, we're all dried out and getting it cleaned up. The only lasting damage was to about 10 kid's bibles that were in the cabinet right above the explosion. We've dried them out and while they are very wrinkled, they are still usable. All's well, that ends well!!

Well, I gotta run!! Later!